what a f-ing weekend!!

man am i exhausted. i had an unexpectedly long and exciting weekend. i leave A.S.A.P. after work on friday to haul ass down to arlington texas, home of aliance field, home of the texas rangers. now, i hate watching baseball on tv unless it's the series, but going to a game is a different story. also, though i don't follow baseball i have to say that the toronto blue jays are my favorite team. i enjoy going to baseball games for one reason: the peanuts. the beer is miller, coors, or b.l. smooth and costs an arm and a leg, the hotdogs are only semi warm, and the buns are stale, but the peanuts, the peanuts are perfect. always warm, you shell them and toss the shell on the floor for the mexicans to pick up after the game, and damn are they tasty!! the tickets for the game were from a previous semi-work related get together, therefore, the game would be a semi-work related get together that we like to call "team building". normally i do not drive to any sort of sporting event due to the fact that i can guarantee that i will be too drunk to drive back. baseball is defferent though. if i am too drunk to leave at the 7th inning stretch, i have the next two innings to sober up! the game was enjoyable, the rangers won 4-2 which angered me cuz they suck.

rewind 12 hours to just before lunchtime on friday....

my boss walks into my office and says "hey, i've got 9 extra tickets to the nascar race on saturday and i can't go.... you want them??" F YEAH!! now i havn't lived in the south long enough to become a nascar fan, and watching it on tv is boring as hell, but i figure that actually being at the race would be different. i was right. the track is 1.5 miles around, and holds 250,000 people. 250,000!!!!!!! that's a damn city!! the track happened to be in denton, tx which is part of the uninhabitable texas land i mentioned in a previous post. it is a monstrocity in the middle of nowhere. it honestly looks like some sort of citadel, with access only through the portcullis. i feared hot tar would be poured on my head. we found our seats and akwardly waited for stadium servents to walk by selling beer...... none came. we went on a search around the stadium for beer vendors.... we found none. we walked the full 1.5 miles and back again in search of any alcoholic beverage (i would have drank rasberry smirnoff ice by this point) and again we came up empty handed. meanwhile, people all around me are walking by drinking bud and miller and coors out of cans carrying coolers full of beer. i was frustrated to say the least. i finally found a small, 20' x 20' caged in area where someone was selling beer. so i bought a $5 can, and attempted to leave. i was abruptly stopped by two security gaurds who told me i had to drink it there. that's when it hit me. the track is in denton, tx which is in denton county, which i know from having to work on oil wells in the area that it is a dry county.

F!!!1!!!!1!!eleven!!!!!!1

i chugged as much beer as my stomach and wallet would allow in the next 10 mins and went back to my seat. i listen to some chick sing the texas anthem over the loud speaker and that was it. no national anthem, no america the beautiful, no nothing. and again, the texas flag being flown was standing higher and was larger than the american flag. typical.

let me tell you something..... race cars are eff-ing loud!!!! i had foam earplugs in my ears, and a ear-muff style radio over that and i still left with my ears ringing. the loudest rock concert you have ever been to does not even compare! my organs are now in different places. as much as i felt like a tool with all this ear protection, i look around and see rednecks carying their kids around; none of which with anything for their ears. typical.

hung over, sunburned, exhausted, and deaf, i return to work. typical.